Advice And Thoughts For The Day:?

If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: “Take two aspirin” and “Keep away from children.”

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.

Relationships are hard. It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.

My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, “Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.”

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: “Duh.”

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God….I could be eating a slow learner.

I think that’s how Chicago and Detroit got started. Bunch of people in New York said, “Gee, I’m enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn’t cold enough. Let’s go west.”

If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

Sometimes I think war is God’s way of teaching us geography.

My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that’s the law.

Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?

Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same.

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan.

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, “My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!”

Usable Quotes….from famous people…..?

Sensible Observations

1) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: ‘Take two aspirin’ and ‘Keep away from children.’
–Author Unknown

2) ‘Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.’
–Drew Carey

3) ‘The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it.. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.’
–Jeff Foxworthy

4) ‘If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there is a man on base.’
–Dave Barry

5) ‘Relationships are hard. It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. There should be severance pay and the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.’
–Bob Ettinger

6) ‘My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, ‘Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.”
–Paula Poundstone

7) ‘A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: ‘Duh.’
–Conan O’Brien

8) ‘Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God….I could be eating a slow learner.’
–Lynda Montgomery

9) ‘I think that’s how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, ‘Gee, I’m enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn’t cold enough. Let’s go west.”
–Richard Jeni

10) ‘If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.’
–Johnny Carson

11) ‘Sometimes I think war is God’s way of teaching us geography.’
–Paul Rodriguez

12) ‘My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that’s the law.’
–Jerry Seinfeld

13) ‘Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?’
–Warren Hutcherson

14) ‘Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same.’
–Oscar Wilde

15) ‘Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress.. But I repeat myself.’
–Mark Twain

16) ‘Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan ‘
–A. Whitney Brown

17) ‘You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!”
–Dave Barry

18) Do you know why they call it ‘PMS’? Because ‘Mad Cow Disease’ was taken.
– Unknown, presumed deceased

19) ‘Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.’
–W. C. Fields

does anyone love a dog that demands time ,effort and sacrifice due to illness?

I have a 15 yr old spaniel cross, he lost his eyes due to glaucoma 3,5 years ago, not long after that he developed diabetes , and about a year ago he started with urinary incontinence, and now he walks in circles everyday, until I stop him.

I have taken him to the vet, numerous times, and due to his age and diabetic status, any kind of surgery is a big NO.
so my vet has in very minimal words told me to give him love until he has no quality of life left, or perhaps passes away naturally.
I am not even sure what constitutes quality of life for him… I mean, he still wags his tail, he walks around, even though he bumps into everything and gets lost in the garden for hours… he enjoys his food, and affection from me, I dont walk him a lot because its a very slow walk… but when we go he does enjoy walking.
I have to make sure he eats and gets an insulin injection every 12hours… that means sometimes no matter where I am I have to excuse myself or leave early due to my dog… not many understand this
he is on medication for urinary incontinence but doesnt always work… I often have to wash his bedding and him regularily …not to mention that he does accidently walk into his poo or the other dogs poo, and brings it inside too, I am more often than not washing poo off from under his feet

are there other people out there with a similar situation.?.. how do you cope having such a needy dog?
some days I am so tired, he is hand full, and has meant some sacrifice from me, but I just love him, and he makes me laugh and he is very cute and fluffy… so having him PTS is not an option

I just want to know how other people out there deal with their dogs that demand lots of attention and time.

from
Marilyn
please share your stories with me .